If I Shut My Eyes, I Believed,

I Knew Something As I Watched: Almost Everyone Was Saying Goodbye To Me. I Was Becoming One Of The Many Little-girl-losts. They Would Go Back To Their Homes And Put Me To Rest, A Letter From The Past Never To Be Reopened Or Reread. And I Could Say Goodbye To Them, Wish Them Well, Bless Them Somehow For Their Good Thoughts. A Handshake In The Street, A Dropped Item Picked Up And Retrieved And Handed Back, Or A Friendly Wave From The Distant Window, A Nod, A Smile, A Moment When The Eyes Lock Over The Antics Of A Child.

He Would Find His Susie,inside His Young Son. Give That Love To The Living.

Do You Miss Susie?" Because It Was Dark, Because Ruth Was Facing Away From Her,because Ruth Was Almost A Stranger, Lindsey Said What She Felt. "more Than Anyone Will Ever Know.

Once Released From Life, Having Lost It In Such Violence, I Couldn’t Calculate My Steps. I Didn’t Have Time For Contemplation. In Violence It Is The Getting Out That You Concentrate On. When You Begin To Go Over The Edge, Life Receding From You As A Boat Recedes Inevitably From The Shore, You Hold On To Death Tightly, Like A Rope That Will Transport You, And You Swing Out On It, Hoping To Land Away From Where You Are.

After Telling The Hard Facts To Anyone From Lover To Friend, I Have Changed In Their Eyes. Often It Is Awe Or Admiration, Sometimes It Is Repulsion, Once Or Twice It Has Been Fury Hurled Directly At Me For Reasons I Remain Unsure Of.