I Went To A Freak Show And

I'm At An Age Where I Think More About Food Than I Do About Sex. Last Week I Put A Mirror Over My Dining Room Table.

I'm Not A Sexy Guy. I Went To A Hooker. I Dropped My Pants. She Dropped Her Price.

I Knew A Girl So Ugly, They Use Her In Prisons To Cure Sex Offenders.

My Son's An Idiot. He Sprained His Ankle Playing Golf. He Fell Off The Ballwasher.

Oh, When I Was A Kid In Show Business I Was Poor. I Used To Go To Orgies To Eat The Grapes.