I Used To Have A House In

I Used To Think I Was Like The Wicket- Keeper, Which Is Like The Catcher In Base- Ball, Y'know What I Mean? You Can Call The Play A Lot From Behind The Plate, Y'know What I Mean? You're Not Necessarily The Star, You're Not The One That Makes The Mark, But Usually In The End, You're Called Upon To Get A Run When It's Needed.

Life Doesn't Make Any Sense, And We All Pretend It Does. Comedy's Job Is To Point Out That It Doesn't Make Sense, And That It Doesn't Make Much Difference Anyway.

You Initially Become Funny As A Kid Because You're Looking For Attention And Love. Psychologists Think That's All To Do With Mother Abandonment. I Think John Cleese Has His Depressions, And Terry Gilliam's The Same. All Of Us Together Make One Completely Insane Person.

When, In 1966, I Progressed To The Frost Report, I Was Paid Ten Guineas A Minute. I Was Guaranteed Three Minutes A Week, So This Was Good Money.

Nobody Gets Irony Anymore, As We Are Now Living In The Post-ironic Age. Once George Bush Gets A Library, Our Irony Is Dead.