I Think You Should Live Your Life

There's Nothing More Dangerous Than A Resourceful Idiot.

Lately, The Only Thing Keeping Me From Being A Serial Killer Is My Distaste For Manual Labor.

The Greenest Home Is The One You Don't Build. If You Really Want To Save The Earth, Move In With Another Family And Share A House That's Already Built. Better Yet, Live In The Forest And Eat Whatever The Squirrels Don't Want.

I Was Surprised To Learn That Doing Household Chores Qualifies As Romantic For Most Of You [women]. That's Exactly Why You Should Never Hire A Butler If You Strike It Rich - The Minute That Jeeves Starts Unloading The Dishwasher Without Being Asked, Your Wife Is Going To Start Humping His Leg.

You Might Think The Word "homemade" Is Just A Word We Use As A Marketing Ploy. But What You Don't Realize Is That The Staff Sleeps Here At Night. If Your Tablecloth Is Wrinkled, That's Why.