I Never Saw Anything Funnier Than Texas

The Pyramids Were Built For Pharaohs On The Happy Theory That They Could Take Their Stuff With Them. Versailles Was Built For Kings On The Theory That They Should Live Surrounded By The Finest Stuff. The Mall Of America Is Built On The Premise That We Should All Be Able To Afford This Stuff. It May Be A Shallow Culture, But It's By-god Democratic. Sneer If You Dare; This Is Something New In World History.

Although It Is True That Only About 20 Percent Of American Workers Are In Unions, That 20 Percent Sets The Standards Across The Board In Salaries, Benefits And Working Conditions. If You Are Making A Decent Salary In A Non-union Company, You Owe That To The Unions. One Thing That Corporations Do Not Do Is Give Out Money Out Of The Goodness Of Their Hearts.

Whenever You Hear A Politician Carry On About What A Mess The Schools Are, Be Aware That You Are Looking At The Culprit.

Economist Frederick Thayer Has Studied The History Of Our Balanced-budget Crusades And Has Come Up With Some Depressing Statistics. We Have Had Six Major Depressions In Our History (1819, 1837, 1857, 1873, 1893 And 1929); All Six Of Them Followed Sustained Periods Of Reducing The National Debt. We Have Had Almost Chronic Deficits Since The 1930s, And There Has Been No Depression Since Then - The Longest Crash-free Period In Our History.

And The Funny Thing Is, I've Always Been An Optimist - It's Practically A Congenital Disorder With Me.