I Met This Girl, She Was An

I Bought Myself A Parrot, But It Did Not Say "i'm Hungry", And So It Died.

I Think Foosball Is A Combination Of Soccer And Shish Kabobs.

A Fly Was Very Close To Being Called A Land, Because That's What It Does Half The Time.

People Ask Me For My Autograph After A Show. I'm Not Famous, I Think They're Messing With Me. I Think They're Trying To Make Me Late For Something.

I Went To The Home Depot, Which Was Unnecessary. I Need To Go To The Apartment Depot. Which Is Just A Big Warehouse With A Whole Lot Of People Standing Around Saying "we Don't Have To Fix Anything."