I Like My Parents But They Are

We're All Animals, That We All Respond To The Same Stimuli. If You Want To Motivate Somebody Not To Have Premarital Sex, Or Motivate Black Bears Not To Go Diving Into Dumpsters, First You Have To Think About Why They Do It. Telling Them To Stop Isn't Going To Help. There Has To Be Some Incentive For Them To Alter Their Behavior.

Millions Of Guys Play Millions Of Basketball Games Every Day Of The Week At The Playground Or The Ymca. But Lebron James Gets $20 Million A Year Because He Can Jam On All Of Those Guys. We're Always Going To Want To See Lebron And Kobe Go At It.

If Joy Behar Or Sherri Shepherd Was A Dude, They'd Be Off Tv. They're Not Funny Enough For Dudes. What If Roseanne Barr Was A Dude? Think We'd Know Who She Was?

I'm A Sort Of Nuts-and-bolts Guy. I'm Into Turning Wrenches And Swinging A Hammer And Wrenching On Cars.

If You Spend Your Life Walking Through Somebody Else's Museum, You Never Find Out Whether You're Rembrandt Or Not.