I Hate People Who Think It's Clever

I Tend Not To Trust People Who Live In Very Tidy Houses. I Know That On The Surface There Is Nothing Wrong With A Person Being Well-ordered And Disciplined. Nothing, Except That It Leaves The Impression Of That Person Having Lived In The Confines Of A Stark Institution Which, Although He Or She Has Long Since Left, Remains Within.

I Think It Is More A Cautiousness That Protects Me From Enthusiasm About Things. I Tend Not To Get Excited. People Perceive It As A Scowl, Which Is Fair Enough.

I Was On Various Anti-depressants, But Not For Long - I Didn't Function Very Well On Them. I Felt Sort Of Flattened Out.

I Had A Longing For Ritual, Something I Could Cling To, A Routine To Make Me Feel Well And Contented. I Hoped That Reading Bible Commentaries And Theological Critiques Would Nudge Me Closer To Some Kind Of Absolute That I Could Hold Up As A Torch To Light My Way.

If I've Inadvertently Become Some Sort Of Role Model For Failed Comedians, Then It's Really Backfired Very Badly On Me.