I Got Sober. I Stopped Killing Myself

I'm Not So Much A Dragon Slayer, More A Dragon Annoyer -- I'm A Dragon Irritater.

The Devil Is Not Abroad At Night In The Form Of A Cat Or A Wolf Or Any Other Animal. He Lives Eternally In The Hearts Of Men.

I Don't Think Wood Was Discovered In Britain Until The 1970's. That's When I Discovered It Anyway.

Jeb Bush Announced Today On The Internet That He May Run For President. The Next Presidential Election Could Be Bush Vs. Clinton. It Will Be Like 1992 All Over Again Except I Won't Be In Rehab.

Bp Ceo Tony Hayward Said Recently, 'no One Wants This Thing Over More Than I Do. I'd Like My Life Back.' Tony, I'm So Sorry You Had Your Summer Disrupted. I'd Buy You A Drink, But You'd Probably Spill That Too And Make Me Clean It Up.