A Junkie Will Steal Your Purse, And

Andy Warhol Said That In The Future Everyone Will Be Famous For 15 Minutes. Facebook Is Exactly Like That Except You're Not Really Famous And Your 15 Minutes Goes On Forever.

Time Is Only Linear For Engineers And Referees.

I Don't Just Like Sexual Double Entendres I Love Them, I Stroke Them, I Milk Them, I Spank Them When They're Naughty.

Personally, I Hope He Doesn't Get Out Of The Campaign. I Need Rick Perry. I Don't Want To Spend The Next Year Trying To Do Jokes About Mitt Romney.

By The Power Of Steven Wright's Beard!