I Got Picked On A Lot, Even

Sometimes I Talk To Religious People About My Column Or What I Do, And I Ask Them To, You Know, Read 20 Or 30 Of Them And Then Come Tell Me That The Message At The Heart Of Every Column Isn't, 'do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You.' In Every Possible Sense.

If Sex Isn't An Important Part Of Your Marriage, You Can't Beef If Your Wife Or Husband Does This Unimportant Thing With Somebody Else Every Once In A While, If You Have No Interest In It.

My Dad And Mom Were More Like World War Ii-era Parents, Even Though It Was The 1960s, Because They Were Both Born In The '40s. They Were Young Adults Before The '60s Even Happened, And Married, And Already Having Kids. But By The Time We Were Adolescents In The '70s, The Whole Culture Was Screaming At Parents, "you're A Good Parent If You're Open With Your Kids About Sex." They Attempted To Be Open With Us About Sex, And It Made Them Want To Die, And Consequently, It Made Us Want To Die.

Take Me To The Driest County In The Most Conservative State, And In Two Hours This Determined Hedonist Will Find You All The Drugs, Whores, And Booze You'll Need To Pass An Eventful Weekend.

Today's Unspeakable Perversion Is Tomorrow's Kink, Is Next Week's Good Clean Fun