I Don't Want To Own Anything That

Television Is A Device That Permits People Who Haven't Anything To Do To Watch People Who Can't Do Anything.

I Have Just Returned From Boston. It Is The Only Thing To Do If You Find Yourself Up There.

A Committee Is A Group Of People Who Individually Can Do Nothing, But Who, As A Group, Can Meet And Decide That Nothing Can Be Done.

Father Time Is The Make-up Man Responsible For The Physical Changes That Determine The Parts The Average Actor Is To Play.

All That The Comedian Has To Show For His Years Of Work And Aggravation Is The Echo Of Forgotten Laughter.