I Don't Think I've Ever Died On

Who Discovered We Could Get Milk From Cows, And What Did He Think He Was Doing At The Time?

I've Always Been Fascinated By The Difference Between The Jokes You Can Tell Your Friends But You Can't Tell To An Audience. There's A Fine Line You Have To Tread Because You Don't Know Who Is Out There In The Auditorium. A Lot Of People Are Too Easily Offended.

There's No Such Thing As Bad Weather - Only The Wrong Clothes.

Whenever I Wear Something Expensive It Looks Stolen.

My Advice To You, If You Want To Lose A Bit Of Weight: Don't Eat Anything That Comes In A Bucket. Buckets Are The Kitchen Utensils Of The Farmyard.