I Don't Play Golf. Mark Twain Is

I Never, Ever Update Mark Twain. I Don't Modernize It. I Let The Audience Update The Material. When I Go Out On Stage, I'm Trying To Make The Audience Believe They're Looking At This Guy Who Died 104 Years Ago And Listening To Him And Saying To Themselves, "jesus, He Could Be Talking About Today." And That's The Point.

I Tended To Lean Toward Character Work. I Love To Disguise Myself.

You Can Go Into Mark Twain's Material And Prove Anything You Want. He Was Against War. He Was For War. He Was Against Rich People And He Was For Them. He Was A Kaleidoscope

Lobbyists In Washington Are Making Six Figure Salaries Selling Our Government Out To The Corporate Interests And We Just Sit And Smile As If Nothing Is Happening While The Poor Folks Are Getting Poorer And Their Pharmaceutical Bills Rise.

Look, See, Learn, Become A Citizen Of Mankind, Not Just Hannibal, Missouri. That Is The Message Of [mark] Twain.