I Don't Need To Be Born Again.

That Field Goal Attempt Was So Far To The Left It Nearly Decapitated Lyndon Larouche.

The Current Tax Code Is Harder To Understand Than Bob Dylan Reading Finnegans Wake In A Wind Tunnel.

Detroit's So Bad This Year They Might Lose Their Bye Week.

I Think The American Legal System Sucks Worse Than A Celine Dion Cover Version Of Whole Lotta Love.

I Like Money. It's Fun To Fold And Stack And Smell And Look At. It's Just Plain Fun To Count Money, And I Often Do It In A Loud Falsetto While Wearing Nothing But A Captain's Hat And A Coin Changer.