I Don't Do Heroin Myself, But It's

We Had A National Tragedy This Week, And The President Of The United States And Sarah Palin Both Made Speeches On The Same Day. Obama Came Out Against Lunatics With Guns, She Gave The Rebuttal.

All I Did Was Tell The Truth. That's Is What The Whole Show Is About! And If Politically Incorrect Has To Go Down For It, So Be It!

Time Magazine Put Chris Christie On The Cover With The Caption, 'the Elephant In The Room.' And People Magazine Named Him 'sexiest Garbage Truck In A Suit.'

The Comedy Gods Are Smiling On Me Tonight, Because I Have Been Saying, For The Longest Time, That President Bush Must Set A Timetable For Removing His Head From His Ass...and, By God, Today They Went In And Looked For It... They Didn't Find It. So Now We Don't Know Where It Is, But At Least For Once In My Life, I Get To See The Words "bush", "operation", And "success" In The Same Sentence.

I'm Staying In A Strange Hotel. I Called Room Service For A Sandwich And They Sent Up Two Hookers.