I Can't Wait To Get Off The

You Know Crazy Straws - They Go All Over The Place? These Straws Are Sane. They Never Lost Their Mind. They Say, "we're Going Straight To The Mouth. That Guy Who Takes A While To Get There? He's Crazy."

If You Have To Release Bad News To The Public, It Would Help If You Are Not Ugly.

I Wrote My Friend A Letter Using A Highlighting Pen. But He Could Not Read It, He Thought I Was Trying To Show Him Certain Parts Of A Piece Of Paper.

If You're Watching A Parade, Don't Follow It. It Never Changes. If The Parade Is Boring, Run In The Opposite Direction. You Will Fast-forward The Parade.

All These Jokes Have Been Pre-approved As Funny By Me.