I Can't Tell A Joke To Save

Comedy Is Tragedy Plus Time.

I Couldn't Get The Laughter Out Of My Head. It Wasn't Career. It Wasn't Even A Choice. It Was A Calling.

My Grandmother And I Followed My Mother Here, To A House A Block North Of Hollywood Boulevard But A Million Miles Away From Hollywood, If You Know What I Mean. We Would Hang Out Behind The Ropes And Look At The Movie Stars Arriving At The Premieres.

The First Time Someone Said, 'what Are Your Measurements?' I Answered, '37, 24, 38 - But Not Necessarily In That Order.'

People Invite Me To Dinner Not Because I Can Cook, But Because I Like To Clean Up. I Get Immediate Gratification From Windex. Yes, I Do Windows.