I Just Believe In A Huge Universe

My Father, Who Was A Sergeant In The Raf During The Second World War, Was Killed In A Hitchhiking Accident While Returning Home On Compassionate Leave. As A Result, My Mother Had To Get Work, As A Nurse, And At Seven The Raf Put Me Into A Boarding School And Ex-orphanage Called The Royal Wolverhampton School.

They're A Typical Hollywood Audience. All The Kids Are On Drugs And All The Adults Are On Roller Skates.

At Cambridge, You Have To Kiss The Vice-chancellor's Fingers. But I Missed Out On That, 'cause I Was Doing A Matinee. I Don't Want To Kiss A Strange Man's Fingers Anyway.

When I Was 23 I Started Writing For I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again And Was Paid Three Guineas For Every Minute's Airtime.

John Cleese Once Told Me He'd Do Anything For Money. So I Offered Him A Pound To Shut Up, And He Took It.