I Can Tell How Lonely I Am

You Know What's The Greatest Part Of Anything Ever In The History Of Everything? Exaggeration. No, Wait; It's Correcting Yourself. No, Better Yet, It's Making Lists.

Usually My Favorite Joke Is Whichever Joke I Most Recently Came Up With That Surprised Me The First Time I Thought Of It.

I Can Tell How Lonely I Am By How Easily I'm Fooled By A Mannequin In A Store.

Let No Man's Deathbed Be A Futon.

A Musical Is The Same As A Burlap Sack, I Would Not Want To Be In Either