I'm Jewish, But I'm Totally Not.

Dear America, When You Tell Gay Americans That They Can't Serve Their Country Openly Or Marry The Person That They Love, You're Telling That To Kids Too. So Don't Be F**king Shocked And Wonder Where All These Bullies Are Coming From That Are Torturing Young Kids And Driving Them To Kill Themselves Because They're Different; They Learned It From Watching You.

The Good News Is Hopeful Doesn't Mean Dumb. The Bad News Is Cynical Doesn't Mean Smart.

In The Big Picture, Life Has A Gap In It. It Just Does. You Don't Go Crazy Trying To Fill It.

I Didn't Feel So Different Until Maybe, Like, Around Third Grade. Kids Started Blaming Me For My People Killing Jesus.

I Think Fake Boobs Have Done Great Things For Real Boobs. I Think People Finally Appreciate Real Boobs. People Like Real Boobs. I Do. I Also Enjoy The Fact That They Are Life-nourishers.