I Asked A Shop Owner If He

A Man Up In Front Of A Judge Says "i Don't Recognise This Court." "why Not?" "it's Been Redecorated Since The Last Time I Was Here."

I Was In The Far East And I Went Into A Restaurant And I Ordered Octopus And The Waiter Said: "it Takes Four Hours." I Asked Why And He Said: "it Keeps Turning Off The Gas."

Two Irishmen Were Passing A Pub - Well, It Could Happen.

A Man Was Found Dead Covered In Sprinkles, Strawberry Sauce And A Flake. Reports Said He May Have Topped Himself.

A Man Walked Into A Shop And Asked, "how Much Are Your Eggs?" He Said "£1.40 A Dozen". He Then Asked: "how Much Are Your Cracked Ones?" He Said: "35p". He Said: "crack Us Four Dozen."