I Appreciate Your Applause, But I Don't

I Am A Professional Transvestite, So I Can Run About In Heels And Not Fall Over.

Cause Jesus I Do Think Did Exist, And He Was, I Think, A Guy Who Had Interesting Ideas In The Gandhi-type Area, In The Nelson Mandela-type Area, You Know, Relaxed And Groovy; And The Romans Thought, Relaxed And Groovy?! No, No, No, No, No! So They Murdered Him. And Kids Eat Chocolate Eggs, Because Of The Color Of The Chocolate, And The Color Of The... Wood On The Cross. Well, You Tell Me! It's Got Nothing To Do With It, Has It?

I Wanted To Be Less Well-known In Comedy.

Danger Could Be My Middle Name... But It's John.

I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Women. In A Plastic Cup.