I Am A Man Of My Word…

People Only Mention It's A Free Country If They're Doing Something Shitty.

My Friend Named His Car. And I Don't Want To Be Judgemental, But... What A Dork.

'dammit I'm Mad' Is 'dammit I'm Mad' Spelled Backwards.

I Keep A Lighter In My Back Pocket All The Time. I'm Not A Smoker, I Just Really Like Certain Songs.

Checkers Taught Me That A King Is A Man With Another Man On Top Of Him. But Life Taught Me That That's Actually Called A Queen.