I Also Love Mole, The Unsung Hero

If You See Me On Friday, You'll See Different Material On Saturday Night.

My Act Is Based On My Life.

I Hate It, It Is Tedious... When I Write For My Act, It Is Very Improvisational, I Write Bullet Points, I Cannot Sit In Front Of A Computer; That Is Not My Style.

I Was A Soccer Cheerleader. It Doesn't Get Nerdier Than That. I Was Fired From The Soccer Cheerleading Squad After One Year, Which I Believe To This Day Is Unprecedented. You Have To Understand, No One Went To The Soccer Games. In Fact, I Believe Part Of My Duties As A Cheerleader Was To Bake Brownies For The Team.

I Prefer Big Oprah. I Know Oprah Wants To Be Skinny Oprah, But Her Head Is Too Gigantic To Fit On A Skinny Body. She Has To Accept That, Like Kirstie Alley, She Was Meant To Be... Ahm... Voluptuous!