How Can I Die? I'm Booked.

I Get Up Every Morning And Read The Obituary Column. If My Name's Not There, I Eat Breakfast.

I Can't Afford To Die; I'd Lose Too Much Money.

How Can I Die? I'm Booked.

The Happiest People I Know Are The Ones That Are Still Working. The Saddest Are The Ones Who Are Retired. Very Few Performers Retire On Their Own. It's Usually Because No One Wants Them. Six Years Ago Sinatra Announced His Retirement. He's Still Working.

Someone Who Makes You Laugh Is A Comedian. Someone Who Makes You Think And Then Laugh Is A Humorist.