He Was Tenser Than Jesse Jackson On

One Of The Great Things About Being Ignorant Is That I Often Think My Ideas Are Original. It's A Wonderful Feeling. That's Why I Try To Avoid Any Knowledge That Would Spoil The Sensation. Sometimes It Isn't Easy. People Keep Hurling Knowledge At Me, And I Can't Always Duck.

Dogbert: Scientists Have Discovered The Gene That Makes Some People Love Golf. Dilbert: How Can They Tell It's The Golf Gene? Dogbert: It's Plaid And It Lies.

For Most Of My Career I Did One Comic A Day, Every Day, Including Weekends And Holidays.

You Can Change Only What People Know, Not What They Do.

Frankly, I’m Suspicious Of Anyone Who Has A Strong Opinion On A Complicated Issue.