Get A Good Dog. We Have Not

The Most Rewarding Part About Being A Dad Is Just Looking At Children Who Didn't Exist At Some Point. The First Time You Saw Them, They Were The Size Of A Quarter, In A Sonogram, And Now They Can Pour Orange Juice And Yell At Each Other.

My Parenting Style Could Be Described As Not Good Cop Or Bad Cop So Much As Nervous Cop. I'm Always Yelling For Somebody To Stop Because They're About To Get Hurt. I'm The Take A Jacket, Slow Down Guy.

It Turns Out Most Of The Conclusions That I've Come To In Life Have Equally Valid Contradictions. I Think It's True You Need To Make A Plan, Set A Goal And Stick To It, But I Would Also Advise: Don't Keep Your Eyes So Fixed On Your Goal That You Miss What Sneaks Up To Surprise You, Because Magic Will Come From Unexpected Places.

The Jewel In The Baby Product Crown Is The Stroller. And If In America You Are What You Drive, Then In Parentland, You Are What You Push.

I Always Loved Comedy, But I Never Knew It Was Something You Could Learn To Do. I Always Thought That Some People Are Born Comedians ... Just Like Some People Are Born Dentists.