France Is The Only Place Where You

The Reason Why Englishmen Are The Best Husbands In The World Is Because They Want To Be Faithful. A Frenchman Or An Italian Will Wake Up In The Morning And Wonder What Girl He Will Meet. An Englishman Wakes Up And Wonders What The Cricket Score Is.

The Great Majority Of People In England And America Are Modest, Decent And Pure-minded And The Amount Of Virgins In The World Today Is Stupendous.

My Heroines Are Always Virgins. They Never Go To Bed Without A Ring On Their Fingers; Not Until Page 118 At Least.

Every Woman Dreams Of Love. When She Is Young She Prays She Will Find It. When She Is Middle Aged She Hopes For It And When She Is Old She Remembers It.

I Always Wear Boot Polish On My Eyelashes, Because I Am A Very Emotional Person And It Doesn't Run When I Cry.