For Me, Comedy Is A Day-to-day Report

As For Being A Voice In Politics, I Feel Whether You Are Famous Or Not, Busy Or Not, It's Incumbent Upon Every Citizen To Participate In This Government In Any Way We Can.

There Are Many Comedians Who Are Afraid To Work Outside The Coasts And The Casinos Because They're Afraid They'll Bomb.

We Have Women In The Military, But They Don't Put Us In The Front Lines. They Don't Know If We Can Fight, If We Can Kill. I Think We Can. All The General Has To Do Is Walk Over To The Women And Say, 'you See The Enemy Over There? They Say You Look Fat In Those Uniforms.'

While Editors And Newspaper Owners Currently Fret Over Shrinking Readership And Lost Profits, They Do The One Thing That Insures Cutting Their Own Throats; They Keep Reducing Space For The One Feature That Attracts New Young Readers In The First Place; The Comic Strips.

When I Played The Sahara Hotel In Las Vegas On New Year's Eve, I Got To Bring Wiley, My 85-pound Black Lab. He's Responsible For My Favorite New Year's Memory Of All: At The End Of The Show, He Ran Onstage And Then Out Across All The Tables In The Showroom, Sending Champagne Glasses And Gamblers Flying.