Don't Worry About Who Doesn't Like You,

What We're Really Talking About Is A Wonderful Day Set Aside On The Fourth Thursday Of November When No One Diets. I Mean, Why Else Would They Call It Thanksgiving?

Someone Once Threw Me A Small, Brown, Hairy Kiwi Fruit, And I Threw A Wastebasket Over It Until It Was Dead.

In Russia, As I Sat There Day After Day Wearing Headphones, Listening To The Interpreter Struggle To Make Our Words Relevant, I Wondered If We Could Establish Meaningful Rapport With A Nation That Had Never Seen Raisins Dance In Dark Glasses On Tv...never Had A Garage Sale.

The Rose Bowl Is The Only Bowl I've Ever Seen That I Didn't Have To Clean.

When You're An Orthodox Worrier, Some Days Are Worse Than Others.