Don't Work Out, Work In.

I Don't Think I've Ever Died On Stage. I've Had Jokes That Died On Stage. I've Told A Joke And Absolutely Nothing. They Didn't Know It Was The End Of The Joke.

The World Needs More Edwin Morgans, People Who Can Take The Language And Swing It Round Their Heads And Don't Care What You Think.

I've Been A Poser For F--ing Years. I Say, Pose Your Arse Off. You Know, Have A Laugh.

Nothing Means Anything Here. When They Pull Down An Outstanding Building, No One Objects. Oh, Maybe There's A Wee Protest From Some Collectors Or Something Who Take A Picture Of It Before It Vanishes.

On George W Bush: That Man Sits At That Desk In The White House With The Button That Can End The World. My Father's Younger Than Him And We Don't Give Him The Controls For The Television.