Don't Ever Have Two Dogs. That Way

It's Getting Harder And Harder To Differentiate Between Schizophrenics And People Talking On A Cell Phone. It Still Brings Me Up Short To Walk By Somebody Who Appears To Be Talking To Themselves.

You Do A Clean Show And It's Over And The Audience Have Enjoyed Themselves And You've Enjoyed Yourself, And You Haven't Had To Resort To Shock.

I'm Most Proud Of The Longevity Of My Marriage, My Kids, And My Grandchildren. If You Don't Have That, You Really Don't Have Very Much.

I Think There's A Part, Just A Part Of Comedians, That Is Still Childlike.

I Was Influenced By Every Comedian I Ever Saw Work. That's The Only Way You Learn How To Do It.