Don't Answer The Door In A Wedding

I Like To Be Around Entertaining People. Even If They're Bored, And You're In A Convalescent Home, There's Something Entertaining About That, In A Way.

I Listen. I Like To Give Advice. Mostly, Ill Just Try To Listen To My Friends, And Theyll Say The Same Thing Over And Over Again.

I Don't Mind Pointing Out Some Of The Failings Of Old Age, Because We Are All Headed In That Direction, Unless Of Course We Take Our Own Lives Before We Become A Burden. I'm Not Advocating Suicide, Oh Wait, I Guess I Am.

More Men Than Women Like 'strangers With Candy'. Pretty Girls Don't Like The Show. They Don't Like To See An Ugly Lady.

If You Decide On Having An Alcoholic At Your Party, Make Sure It's A Large Gathering. This Way, Until The Alcoholic Begins Removing Their Clothes Or Dangling The Cat Out The Window, They Can Sort Of Blend In. An Alcoholic At A Small Gathering Is Called An Intervention.