Comedy Is A Group Activity, A Verbal

If You Live With A Single Parent, You Don't See Compromise. You Witness A Grown Person Living In A World Where They Do What They Want To Do. When You Are Raised By Two Parents, You Are Constantly Watching Compromise Take Place. Just By Observing That, It Made Me A Better Person.

Men Lie The Most, Women Tell The Biggest Lies... A Man's Lie Is, "i'm At Tony House, I Was At Kenny House!" A Woman Lie Is Like, "it's Your Baby!"

Though Part Of Me Had Always Wanted To Be A Comedian, Another Part Of Me Had Always Wanted To Be Bryant Gumbel Or Dan Rather.

The Democrats Should Have An Empty Chair On Stage For The Entire Dnc, And When Anyone Asks Who It Belongs To, They Can Say Osama Bin Laden.

Only Married People Understand You Can Be Miserable And Happy At The Same Time.