Being A Comedian Is A Lot Like

When You're Doing A Big-budget Movie And You're Four On The Call Sheet, You've Got A Lot Of Free Time.

America Is The Only Place Where People Go Hunting On A Full Stomach.

I Know What You're Thinking: Why Is Chris Rock Bagging Groceries? But I Dropped Out Of High School In The Tenth Grade, So If I Couldn't Tell Jokes This Is Exactly What I'd Be Doing.

I Ain't Shootin' Nobody. So Call Me A Faggot! When The War's Over, I'll Be The Faggot With Two Legs, Thank You!

Do You Know What The Good Side Of Crack Is? If You're Up At The Right Hour, You Can Get A Vcr For $1.50. You Can Furnish Your Whole House For $10.95.