Chaos And Intensity Are No Substitute For

Manic Depression Distorts Moods And Thoughts, Incites Dreadful Behaviors, Destroys The Basis Of Rational Thought, And Too Often Erodes The Desire And Will To Live.

I Decided Early In Graduate School That I Needed To Do Something About My Moods. It Quickly Came Down To A Choice Between Seeing A Psychiatrist Or Buying A Horse. Since Almost Everyone I Knew Was Seeing A Psychiatrist, And Since I Had An Absolute Belief That I Should Be Able To Handle My Own Problems, I Naturally Bought A Horse.

I Long Ago Abandoned The Notion Of A Life Without Storms, Or A World Without Dry And Killing Seasons. Life Is Too Complicated, Too Constantly Changing, To Be Anything But What It Is. And I Am, By Nature, Too Mercurial To Be Anything But Deeply Wary Of The Grave Unnaturalness Involved In Any Attempt To Exert Too Much Control Over Essentially Uncontrollable Forces. There Will Always Be Propelling, Disturbing Elements, And They Will Be There Until, As Lowell Put It, The Watch Is Taken From The Wrist.

I Am Reminded Of The Importance Of Small Kindnesses.

I Realized That It Was Not That I Didn’t Want To Go On Without Him. I Did. It Was Just That I Didn’t Know Why I Wanted To Go On