Brothers Don't Shake Hands. Brothers Gotta Hug.

I Have What Doctors Call A Little Bit Of A Weight Problem.

I Was In The Pritikin Center In Santa Monica Once, Trying To Lose 30 Or 40 Pounds In A Month. I'd Work... On A Treadmill And With The Weights, But It Was Driving Me Nuts. So I Escaped. Tom Arnold Picked Me Up And We Went To Le Dome And Had Tons Of Desserts.

I Have A Tendency Toward The Pleasures Of The Flesh. It's A Battle For Me, As Far As Weight And Things Like That. But I'm Curbing Them Because I Want To Continue To Do Comedy, And The Two Don't Mix. So I Try To Fight Those Demons.

The Point Is, How Do You Know The Guarantee Fairy Isn't A Crazy Glue Sniffer.

I Can Get A Great Look At A T-bone Steak By Shoving My Head Up A Bull's Ass But I'd Rather Take The Butchers Word For It.