Boredom Can Be A Lethal Thing On

She Hugged Me And I Could Feel The Heat Rise In My Face, Either From Shame Or Love, Like There Was A Difference.

Like Most Beta Males, He Didn't Realize That Being A Good Guy Was Not Necessarily An Attraction To Women.

If They'd Been Dogs, They Would Have All Been In The Yard Eating Grass And Trying To Yak Up Whatever Was Making Them Feel So Lousy. Not A Bone Gnawed, Not A Ball Chased-all Tails Went Unwagged. Oh, Life Is A Fast Cat, A Short Leash, A Flea In That Place Where You Just Can't Scratch.

[in Reference To Turkey Bowling] He [tommy] Squinted And Picked His Target, Then Took His Steps And Sent The Bird Sliding Down The Aisle. A Collective Gasp Rose From The Crew As The Fourteen-pound, Self-basting, Fresh-frozen Projectile Of Wholesome Savory Goodness Plowed Into The Soap Bottles Like A Freight Train Into A Chorus Line Of Drunken Grandmothers.

Theophilus Crowe's Mobile Phone Played Eight Bars Of "tangled Up In Blue" In An Irritating Electronic Voice That Sounded Like A Choir Of Suffering Houseflies, Or Jiminy Cricket Huffing Helium, Or, Well, You Know, Bob Dylan.