At Least I Carpe'd That One Diem.

I Told Augustus The Broad Outline Of My Miracle: Diagnosed With Stage Iv Thyroid Cancer When I Was Thirteen. (i Didn’t Tell Him That The Diagnosis Came Three Months After I Got My First Period. Like: Congratulations! You’re A Woman. Now Die.)

I Was A Bit Of A Victorian Lady, Fainting-wise.

Moms Aren’t The Best Audience For Medication Humor.

When You Stopped Wishing Things Wouldn't Fall Apart, You'd Stop Suffering When They Did.

"please Stop," I Said. "you're Upsetting The Black Santas."