Are You Going To Come Quietly, Or

I'm Irish. We Think Sideways

I Told You I Was Ill. (on His Headstone)

Chopsticks Are One Of The Reasons The Chinese Never Invented Custard.

Money Can't Buy You Happiness But It Does Bring You A More Pleasant Form Of Misery.

I Have The Body Of An Eighteen Year Old. I Keep It In The Fridge.