And If I Am Elected, I Promise

If Zipper Catches Skin, I'll Know I Had It Out When I Should A Kept It In.

Chained In A Cell, Got My Own Private Hell. Preacher Crucifies Me, Warden Wants To Fry Me.

You Ain't No Hepburn And I Ain't No Fonda, But If You Were Drowning In Golden Ponda, Mouth To Mouth I'd Resuscitate You.

The Minute You Step Onstage, You Get Eight Feet Taller.

I Have Never Made Fun Of Religion. Religion Is Something I Don't Even Want To Mess With, Because I Am Really Afraid Of The Clouds Opening Up And My Being Struck By Lightning.