All I've Ever Done Is Try To

I Just Had A Pedicure. My Feet Are Soft Like A Baby's Behind. If His Ass Was Covered In Calluses.

What I've Learned About Comedy People Is That They're Defined By The Harshest Level They've Been To, Their Personal Auschwitz.

The Secret To Raising Children Is To Love Them... And Teach Them To Operate In A Way You Can Tolerate Them The Best.

I Don't Roll Like That But I've Never Been With A Hooker Either. Yeah, That's Good To Say In An Interview Cause I Feel Bad A Little Because People Grew Up Watching Me And That's A Little Disturbing.

I Was On Entourage Last Week Smoking A Bong And Making Out With Hookers And I Did Show Them That Before, Cause It Wasn't A Hard 'r' Cause A Lot Of People Are Watching That Show That They Know, Not My Little One - She's 12, But Very Sophisticated So It's An Unusual Case.