A Man Who's Intoxicated All The Time

No Man Is Boss In His Own Home, But He Can Make Up For It, He Thinks, By Making A Dog Play Dead.

Thou Shalt Not Kill Anything Less Than A Fifth.

I Personally Stay Away From Natural Foods. At My Age I Need All The Preservatives I Can Get.

I Don't Object To Nine Aces In One Deck. But When A Man Lays Down Five Aces In One Hand... And Besides, I Know What I Dealt Him!

It's Quite True I'm Not Drinking Anymore; However, I'm Not Drinking Any Less Either.