A Lot Of People Don't Realise I

When I Have Sex With My Husband, I Fantasize I Am With A Petite, Hot Young Woman.

I Usually Get Up At 3 A.m. I Don't Require A Lot Of Sleep, And If I Get Tired, I'll Take A Powernap During The Day.

I Didn't Know Any Gay People In My Childhood.

My Mama Never Wore A Pair Of Pants When I Was Growing Up, And Now That's All She Wears. It Was So Funny For Me When I First Started Seeing Mama Wear Pants. It Was Like It Wasn't Mama. Now I've Bought Her Many A Pantsuit Because She Just Lives In Them.

[on Why She Doesn't Exercise:] If I Tried To Jog With These Boobs, I'd End Up With Two Black Eyes.