A Hooker Once Told Me She Had

I Tell Ya, I Was An Ugly Kid. I Was So Ugly That My Dad Kept The Kid's Picture That Came With The Wallet He Bought.

I Took My Son To Coney Island, I Said "wanna Go In The Crazy House?", He Said "save Your Money We'll Be Home Soon"!

Never Guess Your Wife's Size. Just Buy Anything Marked Petite And Hold On To The Receipt.

My Wife Has Teeth Like The Stars... They Come Out At Night.

Everyone Gets Their Rough Day. No One Gets A Free Ride. Today So Far, I Had A Good Day. I Got A Dial Tone.