A City Is A State - Of

When A Place Advertises Itself As 'world Famous,' You May Be Sure It Isn't.

A Good Column Is One That Sells Paper. It Doesn't Matter How Beautifully It Is Written And How Much You Admire The Author... If It Doesn't Sell Any Papers, It's Not A Good Column. It's A Terrible Yardstick To Use, But In The Newspaper Business, That's The Whole Thing.

You Cover Q-tips With Sandpaper And Ram Them Up Your Nostrils As Far As They Will Go. Then You Sniff Talcum Powder While Shredding Hundred Dollar Bills.

Philosophically, I Don't Like Doing Commercials.

A City Is Where You Can Sign A Petition, Boo The Chief Justice, Fish Off A Pier, Gaze At A Hippopotamus, Buy A Flower At The Corner, Or Get A Good Hamburger Or A Bad Girl At 4 A.m. A City Is Where Sirens Make White Streaks Of Sound In The Sky And Foghorns Speak In Dark Grays. San Francisco Is Such A City.