Your Waistline Is Your Lifeline

Go On, Have A Glass Of Wine With Dinner. What Is Wine, Anyway? Pure Grapes. A Glass Of Wine Is Much Better For You Than A Coke.

When It Comes To Health, Diet Is The Queen, But Exercise Is The King.

Sitting Around On Your Big Fat Gluteus Maximus Talking About The Good Old Days. The Good Old Days Are Right This Second. You've Got To Exercise Vig-or-ously! Life Is Tough. Life Is A Challenge. Life Is A Battlefield... . Life Is An Athletic Event, And You Must Train For It.

Homosexuals Love To Look Good. They're Clean, Neat. They're Fastidious, Well Mannered And Well Educated. They Like Aesthetic Things. They Like Good, Firm, Tight Bodies. Health. They Want To Attract Other Guys. What's Wrong With That? Why Be Slobs? You've Got To Be Insane To Suggest That Because Someone Looks Good, He Must Be Gay. That's Envy.

The First Thing I Did When I Was Forty Years Old, I Put Handcuffs On And I Jumped Off Alcatraz Prison And Swam To San Francisco Handcuffed. That Made National Publicity. Then, There Were Three Or Four Years Where I Would Do More Difficult Feats. Another Birthday I Towed A Thousand Pound Boat Across The Golden Gate. On My 65th Birthday I Towed 65 Boats A Mile And A Half In Tokyo. On My 70th Birthday I Towed 70 Boats With 70 People In It With My Feet And Hands Tied A Mile And A Half In Long Beach.... My Next Birthday I Will Be 93. I'm Gonna Tow My Wife Across The Bathtub.