Your Fuselage Shouldn't Open More Easily Than

F. Scott Fitzgerald Has An Indespensible Quote: 'the Test Of A First-rate Intelligence Is The Ability To Hold Two Opposed Ideas In The Mind At Once And Still Retain The Ability To Function'. Or, As I Like To Call It, 'o.j. Killed His Wife, And The Police Are Corrupt.'

The Clinton White House Today Said They Would Start To Give National Security And Intelligence Briefings To George Bush. I Don't Know How Well This Is Working Out. Today After The First One Bush Said, 'i've Got One Question: What Color Is The Red Phone?'

I Thought This Election Was An Adult Discussion On How Best To Protect Ourselves In The Face Of Terrorism, But Apparently It Was A Referendum On Boys Kissing... When Homophobia Trumps Terrorism In America, Wow. This Country Needs To Get Laid.

We Are A Nation That Is Unenlightened Because Of Religion. I Do Believe That. I Think That Religion Stops People From Thinking. I Think It Justifies Crazies.

Trump Is A Little Tone-deaf To The Average American. He Unveiled His Slogan This Week: 'are You Better Off Than You Were Four Wives Ago?'