You Won’t Be Able To Take Your

I Pride Myself On Being The Guy Who Can Do Def Comedy Jam And Charlie Rose. And Do Well On Both.

So, To Say Obama Is Progress Is Saying That He’s The First Black Person That Is Qualified To Be President. That’s Not Black Progress. That’s White Progress. There’s Been Black People Qualified To Be President For Hundreds Of Years. The Question Is, You Know, My Kids Are Smart, Educated, Beautiful, Polite Children. There Have Been Smart, Educated, Beautiful, Polite Black Children For Hundreds Of Years. The Advantage That My Children Have Is That My Children Are Encountering The Nicest White People That America Has Ever Produced. Let’s Hope America Keeps Producing Nicer White People.

I'm A Nerd. I'm A Little Guy... The Last Guy You'd Expect In A Romantic Movie.

God Bless America. And No Place Else.

I Can See The Humor In Just About Any Situation. After I Lost My Dad, I Realized That None Of Us Should Take Things Too Seriously, Because Everything Except Death Works Itself Out.